A Mixed Bag of Emotions, A Tribute to Father's Day
Good morning, beautiful souls it’s 9:42 AM Eastern and I just woke up about 20 minutes ago. I did my morning routine: prayers lying down and spiritual readings. I like to do that, I have to do that before I get up because if I get up, my mind will take me somewhere else physically and mentally and it won’t get done until later on in the afternoon, and by that time, I’m praying not to cuss somebody out.
After my morning readings, I started my subscription readings. I like to pick a day a week when I can sit down and read some of my new subscriptions. I’m starting to find my tribe all those metaphysicians, spiritualists, deep thinkers, conscious and rooted folks devoted to healing, etc…
I started reading and I came across a writing that was about Father’s Day. I was just gonna skip right over the feelings of that. Father’s Day is a strange holiday for me, hell all of them are. When you grow up as a kid not celebrating any holidays, including your own birthday, it really messes up your memories associated with these happy times for others. When you get older and become a seeker, and you realize that most of the US holidays are all originated in paganism and motivated by capitalism it brings a new sense of strange. The first Father’s Day celebration was on June 19, 1910, in Washington. However, the pagan roots of Father’s Day are said to be connected to the worship of the sun and celebrated close to the summer solstice.
For me, my relationship with my father is not close. We started out very close when I was a young child. but as I grew older and as a fully grown adult woman, our relationship was distant and cold. There isn’t a single Father’s Day that I have ever celebrated with my dad since I’ve been on this earth. I get about three calls a year, two of which I’ll initiate. The other one he’ll call me, and lie about having called me before, and the phone calls last for about 2 1/2 minutes. So in those few phone calls, we haven’t had much chance to build anything, but it always ends with. I love you. Strange indeed!
Fourteen years ago, I became a widow before the age of 30 years old. This life experience shifted my life and rocked my reality in ways that I can’t even describe. This man was a stepfather of my then young children, but he was their dad. There’s something about a man who loves your children as much as you that makes you love him more. He was so instrumental and those foundational years for my children and myself. We celebrated Father’s Day with him and he showed me what a father looked like my children didn’t want or need for anything. All of their needs were met both physically and emotionally. Every Father’s Day, I am reminded of the bittersweet memories of an absent father who still exists, a phenomenal, father, and a dad who no longer exists in the physical realm.
Throughout the 14 years, I had various partners some serious and some, just passing by. There were a few Father’s Day celebrations along the way but nothing major. Today is Father’s Day, and I am taking my partner on a Father’s Day brunch. I’m happy to celebrate with him and for him, because he is a father to his children but I can’t let the day pass without remembering the bag of emotions I feel about this day.
I will take my reflections about this day into the day and find the love and joy that I can remember from my own experience with my dad, my children’s stepdad and I will celebrate with all of those who have happy memories as I watch the joy of fathers having their special day and the love they have expressed in their families.
Prayer for the day:
Great spirit, surround me with your love and express through me as divine love as I go through throughout the day for gratitude for all of my life’s experiences. These experiences have shaped me have taught me and have allowed me to exist today. I express gratitude for the ancestors and the ancestors returned who have come before me. The father figures and the elders who taught us the way and are still teaching us the way. The protectors, the providers and the women who have taken on dual roles and responsibilities. Without them, there would be no me, today I express gratitude and appreciation for the living ancestors with the whom the torch has been passed.
What are your thoughts about Father’s Day?
What memories do you have surrounding Father’s Day?
How do you celebrate Father’s Day?
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